Judgment.
One of the more common traits I see in people that are a bit pessimistic is their ability to judge everything. Judgment is a damning trait, and I think it’s by design.
We as a society are consumed. It’s the reason we want the next best thing, and the stuff we have now is never enough. We are consumed by media, information, and complacency. Most people haven’t ever experienced real fear, yet live in a constant state of fear. Most people haven’t traveled, yet they know everything there is to know about foreign affairs. We are designed to judge, it’s been programmed into our subconscious.
I’m going to try and explain how our subconscious has been hacked by design, followed by how eliminating judgment will ultimately change your perspective of the world and make you more optimistic.
I listened to a Lex Friedman Podcast recently with his guest Gregory Aldrete. They were discussing the Roman Empire and how the biggest pre-modern empire in the world governed its people. I always had the impression that the Romans were more established than they actually were. Most of the Roman Empire was rural. Most everyone in the Roman Empire were farmers, according to Gregory, it was unusual if you weren’t a farmer.
So what?
This meant that a small rural family lived to secure basic necessities. Their world, all things considered, was miniature. There is no one to judge except themselves. No one is to blame except themselves.
Fear was initiated by the Romans and many of their traditions have carried through today, this in part is why judgment is manufactured into our subconscious.
You have a farmer who lives with his family, minding his own business. He is asked to fight for his empire, meaning he has to sell his small farm and go into battle. To his demise he fights and conquers land for his empire. Once the battles were won, and his position retired, he was given little to nothing in exchange for his service. Meaning, he fought in a war he didn’t need to fight in, lost his land, and now is left with resentment towards the governing body.
Fast forward to today, these tactics are still in use, and it’s hurting our outlook of the world.
It’s easy to judge the person who has it better off than you do. It’s because they are rich a*sholes who were handed everything to by their parents. They are scapegoats when it comes to getting taxed. They build businesses that pay their employees contracted wages, yet they sit atop their throne making money hand over fist. After the contracted employee gives his most valuable asset (time) to this company for years, all he gets is a handshake and watch.
This nightmare scenario happens in every society, all over the world. The biggest point of conflict in this argument is that you are subconsciously trained to judge people and it’s holding you back.
Judgment is manufactured, here’s why. We are beaten to a pulp by information. Most of which comes from media outlets that report the worst things that are happening globally. That media is transferred through word of mouth into society. Grandparents to parents to kids, it becomes a generational issue.
If you grow up in a constant state of fear, you are going to stress yourself out, which then can turn into a habit. So when you hear the world is going to hell, your initial thought is yes, and your brain tries to reason why. Most of the time this comes in the form of judgment, by creating a superficial reality of why the world is going to hell, you genuinely believe that it is, and then you start building connections that support your claim.
It’s much easier to judge, this is why all of us do it, than it is to stay open minded and stoic. Good news is, there is a solution, but it requires work and perspective.
Tool number 1: Create a story that aligns with the best possible alternative to your initial judgment.
That boss, he may have come from nothing, he may be extremely busy and his life on paper may seem glamorous, but he may be in despair. All he knows is how to work hard, so his cold a*shole mentality may come from him using his business as a means to an end. Money is the one thing he can control in his life so why create a ceiling when you can make more. That contract the employee signed onto, was by choice, they knew what they were signing themselves up to do. That job may have provided enough income for generations worth of families.
In reality it’s about how willing you are to open your mind to the idea that your thoughts are separate from your intentions. Even though your initial thought may be judgmental, make sure to create a convincing enough story that is inspiring and optimistic so it doesn’t hold you back.
Tool number 2: Think deeply about where you are in the world today, and what changes are happening in your close circle. This is the farmer analogy, control what you know, don’t worry about what is not personally affecting you.
I had a conversation with my cousin the other day. We were talking about the future and what we should focus our attention on. He is pretty open minded, but the topic of AI came up, and we had differing opinions. He didn’t have judgment, but he basically didn’t care about what it would do for society. I don’t blame him, there are a lot of unknowns, and his existence is entirely consumed by the outdoors. He put himself in a position where AI doesn’t bother him and it’s not worth his attention because he’s more focused on the activities that are important to him.
I thought this was beautiful. In a world where AI didn’t exist in most conversations a year ago, to lighting ablaze a plethora of theories on what the future is going to look like because of it. My cousin is outside minding his own business, pursuing the activities that he loves to do.
Tool number 3: For every moment you catch yourself judging someone else, replace that thought with three nice things that would make their day. This was an idea that Ryan Holiday had on the Jay Shetty Podcast.
You’ll begin to retrain those fear based habits into more positive outlooks on your reality.
Judgment may be holding you back, but with optimism we can create a better reality for everyone. It is a stepping stone into a world where we catch more rockets with chopsticks, or plant millions more acres of trees in Brazil. Attune yourself to the trickle of positivity that cycles through humanity and your perspective will change for the better.
Thank you for reading.
With love,
Kai
Weekly Poem:
A boat drifts the oceans current.
It’s been pulled and pushed.
It’s been abandoned and neglected.
It reaches an island, where a man and his volleyball wait desperately.
So it can serve another purpose.
