Presence.
The reason absolutes are powerful and the reason there are so few of them, is because everything else we engage with in life doesn’t have a defined outcome. Suddenly you’re born; suddenly you die. Suddenly you realize about halfway between the two that the one is a lot closer than the other one. The worst of all the feelings about knowing the absolute certainty in the fact that you’re going to eventually die, is that you as an individual have to face many painful lessons before you get there.
One of which is going through the excruciating pain of just keeping yourself alive. Suddenly you’re feeling great, able bodied and ready to explore, then all the sudden you’re just old, your body aches, and you look at the world with a bitter taste in your mouth for all the wrongdoings against you. Knowing this you have two choices, “Get busy living, or get busy dying” (The Shawshank Redemption).
That brings us to our most powerful absolute. The absolute certainty that you will always live in the present moment. Whether you dwell on the past, or seek solace in the future, you will always remain in the present. The reason knowing this is powerful is because you also have the ability to change the condition of the present state you find yourself in.The more time you spend focusing on whatever is out of your control, the more you forget to look around and enjoy the present. What’s incredible about being more aware of living in the present is the realization that every moment you pass through time has a value. It’s grim to measure your life by the number of days you might have to live on the planet, but it’s also a great gauge at how you’re operating within it.
A few observations that I’ve had because of this shift in awareness:
1. It’s really hard to hold a grudge, especially for the people that you love.
Your body is an energetic tuning fork that is constantly flushing out the toxins within it. The less toxins (fear, hate, envy, grudges) the more energetic you become. There are ways to navigate a grudge, but the easiest way for me to think about them is that as a human, you are inherently flawed. Because of these flaws, it’s okay to make mistakes, even if they can hurt you in the moment. To eventually let go of the grudge, you can either choose to forgive, or choose to reason with and move your interests in another direction. Most people don’t intentionally hurt you, if they do, then it’s okay for you to move them out of your life. You, as a self, have to navigate the world in the way you see best fit, no one can ever take that away from you.
2. Your actions speak louder than your achievements.
I view people as an extension of myself. The more I treat people the way I want to be treated, the more I find myself receiving the same level of respect. It’s okay to achieve and have ambitions, it’s not okay to bring others down because of them. Often the humblest people are the best at their occupations.
3. You are unique and your perspective is what makes the world beautiful.
Everyone has a talent, for some it might be talking, for others it might be reading. It’s liberating operating in this world knowing you are special. Your unique genetic makeup, upbringing, and perspective make you one of a kind. Because of this, you should learn to love what it is that makes you unique, and treat yourself better because of it.
There’s a lot to be said about living in the present, but the simplest is “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.” (Master Oogway, Kung Fu Panda).
Thanks for reading.
With love,
Kai
Weekly Poem:
"Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a Negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride " (Anthony Bourdain)
