Change.
Growing up working in outwardly social establishments, I quickly became an amateur psychologist. While observing people, it’s clear that many hate the idea of change. It’s easier to live a life of comfort and conformity than it is to uproot your entire life and try something new. Another observation you start to make about people is that as much as we treat the earth like it’s separate from us, it is not. Meaning the nature we’ve removed ourselves from is as much a teacher about the natural laws of reality as the words on our textbooks.
One of the laws of nature is change. We are in a constant flux, and because of this, the organisms living within this chaotic biosphere have to succumb to the demands that change brings with it. Unfortunately many times this means, things that involve life (health, relationships, opportunity) also have its death. The reason most people don’t like change is because of fear (the root cause of death). In large doses, fear can be extremely crippling and anxiety inducing. It’s the shadow that carries the burden of all major consequences, and unfortunately has a grip on most people.
What nature and social networks have taught me is that the people that fear the least, are the people that embrace change the most. The people that overcomplicate their situations by creating fake realities which consume their emotions, are often the people that tend to resist change. I’ve found myself here the past couple months. The mind is like a prison, we create patterns, indulge in thoughts, and even create realities that are superficial. These aren’t inherently bad, but if you consume them for long enough, your mind can’t differentiate what is truthful. This is me, I have this existential crisis to figure out who I am and what my purpose is. Leading to overconsuming my thoughts, and planning without action, a life in which I’d be able to pursue my purpose.
Ultimately, what happens to most of us eventually, is that change bests us, and brings us back into the grounded reality. I now find myself in a foreign country, with foreign people, with foreign currency, and back with my parents (who I love deeply, but it’s a bit embarrassing at 26). I feel even further away from my purpose at this moment, which is exactly what I needed. I think what change teaches us is that the patterns we place ourselves in have no truth, unless we believe them to be true. The world is less black and white, and often shifts depending on the perspective of the viewer. As I start to unravel my life, I realize, I don’t have all the answers I’m looking for, and I don’t know if I ever will.
Purpose is like change, sometimes you think you like something, only to realize it’s not what you thought it would be. Often all purpose does for individuals is expose where their niches are best suited within the current society, and exploiting that for some type of exchange. Often it requires discovering who you are, what you’re interested in, and more importantly what you aren’t interested in. The people that seem to do this best, don’t really think about it, and the people like me, tend to build meaning into everything around them. Often overlooking the simple solutions, and over analyzing the jargon of thought we create thousands of times a day. The simple answer to all of this is change. A change in the environment of your own mind, physical space, and location opens avenues to venture down. They are the slits of light you look for in the dark.
Thanks for reading.
With love,
Kai
Weekly Poem:
One by one, change comes knocking, taking pieces of you with it.
One by one, the scars that you once feared start losing their grip of control over you.
One by one, the chiseled marble that we were hiding behind, starts to reveal the beauty of what it is to be thyself.
